Advice on moving abroad

First of all, to anyone reading this having moved country themselves, you are BRAVE! It is something not many people have to do at a young age, and just that makes you an amazing, inspiring, and even-wiser human being!

I know from experience this is an incredibly difficult thing to take in. No matter how many promises you are made about the place you are moving to, letting go of where you grew up and of everything that you are familiar with is undoubtedly a tough nut to crack. However, it can be an amazing experience, and whether or not it is then you can still be very proud and say: I DID IT!

If you are someone who knows there is a chance you/someone you know will move abroad, or even that it is something being considered by your parents, then here are a few tips to help you see this crazy new world in a better light. These little things may just be what you need, whether or not you have been living in your new place for a while or are not even there yet. I find that I still occasionally have to go back and do a few of these steps whenever I am missing England!

1) Express how you feel to others

In the weeks before moving it is natural and completely understandable to become unsure and unsettled about the big transition. Don't just keep it all in, talk to someone about it! Often the most important things are the hardest to say, but I promise that once you do, you feel better. It is 100% okay to just let it out and scream or cry as loud as you like, anybody would in this position :)

You never know, more often than not the person you express these negative feelings to may also have the same worries. It just brings you closer together, and someone close by your side is vital in these times.

It is particularly important to say what you're feeling because you could bring up an important factor that your parent missed amongst it all, for example what you'll study at school, how you will get there, etc.

2) Accept fear of the unknown

Instead of trying to combat nervousness and trying to figure out a solution for every potential problem there might be, take a step back and think: some things you just will not know until you get there!

Every time I was worried and spoke to my mum about it, I would always end up simply stating "I just wish I knew what would happen and whether I like it there. I just hope it's good!" This I had to just wait and see about, and accepting this period of uncertainty is a step closer to feeling more content with moving.

3) Ask questions about your new home

There is nothing worse than getting somewhere and realising what you expected actually isn't the case. This is why it is always best to ask if you are not sure. I had thousands of questions about school, learning the language, transportation, ANYTHING that you are used to suddenly becomes unfamiliar again. Take baby steps and just start from scratch! If your parents/those responsible for you moving don't know the answer, doing a little bit of research will make you feel much securer and not so much like you are stepping into darkness.

4) Get into a regular routine

This is possibly one of the most important pieces of advice I could give, based on my experience of moving! A few days - yep! days! - after moving, I found myself completely lost and shaken. I wasn't at school yet, though my friends at home had already had their first day back after holidays so I felt really out of place. I had moved, unpacked, and it seemed like there was nothing to do for now. For about a week I felt this way, until I started my new school which gave me something new and exciting to focus on.

Getting into a routine may be the one thing that stops you going to plot, as it was for me! Too much time on your hands can be a bad thing and leave space for too much thinking, and getting stuck in to a regular routine will most definitely take your mind off it. This was just getting up early, going to school, coming home, and doing homework for me. After this, I felt so much better and doing little tasks and filling your day up with familiar things I really think will help you feel not so far away from where you lived before.

If you still have a few days left until the regular stuff starts, take yourself out, go on mini walks and adventures and explore your new home. You will end up feeling enlightened, I'm sure!

6) Stay in touch with your family/friends back home

This tip really speaks for itself. There is no reason to isolate yourself from people you love, even if you think it will help living without them so close to you, it will end up making you miss them more. Skyping a few times a week, and a whatsapp every now and then is the perfect way to feel at home. It isn't the same as going round your best friend's house and watching a movie or two whilst catching up, but it is a good substitute. They will love hearing about your new experience, and love that they are the first person you go to to share all these new things with! Remember your best friend (as well as you!) might be worried that you two will grow apart, so constant little reminders that they are still one of the most important people in your life might just make their day, and yours!

7) Give it time

'Good things come to those who wait.' I am a firm believer in this saying! Moving is all about adjusting and this takes time, so if things aren't how you thought they would be then relax, as you put your foot down one after the other the situation will fall into place around you, all by itself! I used to get so impatient, and ask: "Why hasn't this happened yet?" or "Why don't I feel as comfortable in my new school as I should do, even though it's been months?" My mum would just say to give it time. It turns out that I only felt completely comfortable once I changed schools, and that was all it took funnily enough! I just had to wait until the summer came around.

8) Focus on the new, good things you didn't have before

It is natural to compare your old life and your new life, thinking about things you had before that you might not have now. Even your old self and new self, everything about YOU comes under scrunity! "Am I a better person now, or was I better before?" The truth is, you are of course still yourself, just with a different perspective!

I am a prime suspect in this case! If possible, twist this around and be grateful for all the lovely experiences/people you have met having moved. Something I do is think about my future in Denmark compared to in England, but to channel this elsewhere I just think about how much stress I was under at school in London and how free I feel in Denmark, and that I am really learning that quality of life is so important here!

9) Stay open minded

Sometimes the mind can go into a state of 3 year old stubbornness, but we have to tell it no! Being open-minded is the key to getting the most out of your moving experience, and accepting what's different in your new home. Discovering new traditions and adapting to the culture really helps to gather a sense of belonging, and try and find some people who can show you the ins and outs of the city you live in. There can be some beautiful places, coffee-shops or smaller towns that are so you, that you didn't know existed!

10) Be proud of yourself and what you have accomplished

Everyone will make this move at least once in their life, because of a job opportunity, or simply the desire for change, this is except for the few that stay close to home. Your move might just have come a little earlier than expected, as it did for me. Remember you are not alone, and be proud of yourself for making the move and adjusting to a new way of life! Great things really DO come out of it, and I do belive moving country makes you a more open minded person as you accept things you might not have done before. So many things I found completely weird about Denmark I now don't even blink an eye at! It's taken me nearly a year for Denmark to feel like home, but once that time comes I promise you, it feels wonderful!

My advice to all: You don't have to have a plan! Sometimes you just have to let go, and see what happens - Nothing is permanent! :)